Tuesday, April 12, 2005
u noe wat... someone left the tap in the toilet running...so i went to off it...
however, at that point in time... i shld have dried the floor too..
that toilet supposed to be a dry one... which i took for granted... and when i decided to take a shit, i fell down...
excruciating pain shot thru my left palm as i tried to break my fall and my body just bludgeoned the floor, my left elbow hit the floor with a loud thud sound too..
worst of all.. the place where my left hand was injured due to the crash ytd hit the side pole there...
i now meditate in deep thought over my life...
y is it that i must experience this pain...
y is it that God cannot help me at that time...
y is it that i try so hard to ask for a miracle andd i don get one...
y is it that when i wanna try to be discipline, i don get it...
y is it that when i wanted God's presence around me, i don get it...
y is it that when i wanted God to speak for me, i cant hear it...
y is it that i waited 30 mins for God to talk to me, and i still don hear it...
y is it that i want an encounter with God, but i don get it...
y is all these happening to me... i just don understand...
i still cant feel the fire in me... but my hunger is there...
ah well...
perhaps its really time to fly...
perhaps im unlucky...
perhaps im meant to suffer...
perhaps im chosen...
perhaps its a test...
perhaps i cant get wat i want...
perhaps i can never get wat i want...
perhaps i can get wat i want...
perhaps im just too lazy...
orite... i give up...
- I contemplated at 4:24 pm
